Week 2: Toledo Retro-journal

This was a hard game to watch. Missed tackles, bad passes, no blocking, terrible playcalling, kids getting hurt in garbage time. Only reason to keep watching was the hope that Hawkins would embarrass himself enough to get fired.

1st Quarter
15:00 My Dad asks me "Who's Toledo?" A bad team thats probably better than us.

11:47 Camera pans to Dan Hawkins with his greasy hair and greasy expressionless face. When did Hawkins decide it was cool to cover his hair and face in Vaseline before every game?

10:45 Decent drive ending in a punt. Not surprised at all. Buffs able to keep the ball out of the endzone on the punt, but nobody is able to down it before the 14 yard line. TV commentator calls it "poor field position".

8:39 Buffs give up a 60 yard pass on 3rd and 10. Vintage Dan Hawkins. This is what bad teams do, they can't stop plays on 3rd and long. Watch the Broncos the last 2 years, its the exact same problem.

7:18 Rockets touchdown, no real surprise here. Buffs break up the 2-point conversion play, probably one of the better plays of the game. I make a mental note that this will probably be the only drive of the game where the Rockets don't score 7.

3:10 Toldeo running play, 2 missed tackles. A 2 yard loss turns into a first down. Tackle by Jeff Smart, aka the only person on the defense that should be starting on a Big 12 team.

3:00 Deep pass. Our safety is over the top 5 yards away when the catch is made, which is the closest he gets to the receiver on the play. The receiver just runs diagonally all the way to the endzone. 13-0.

1:43 Announcer talks about Tyler Hansen being redshirted. Hawkins will probably burn the redshirt with 3 weeks left in a meaningless season. Again.

:20 Big run by Darrell Scott. This guy hasn't run for less than 5 yards all game. Why doesn't he get the ball every carry? Why didn't he run more than once last week? Why does Dan Hawkins still have a job?

2nd Quarter

13:31 Buffs field goal. At least we aren't getting shut out.

10:41 Toldeo just picking our defense apart. Why are be playing the 4-3 when they bring out 4 and 5 receivers. I know Jeff Smart is good, but he isn't fast enough to cover a receiver 1-on-1.

8:52 Announcer talks about Dan Hawkins running drills in the parking lot before the game. "This ain't intramurals, brotha!"

8:36 Cody isn't that bad. Yes, he can't run, he can't make accurate passes, and he can't see over the offensive line, but he's tough and he doesn't throw the game away. He could be a Todd Reesing with good o-line, good receivers, good running game, and good defense. Too bad he won't have any of those until Dan Hawkins gets fired.

6:37 3 runs by Darrell Scott, first down.

4:50 Aric Goodman barely misses a field goal. Good effort on the drive, but still down 16-3.

1:43 Great catch by Scotty. This guy would be a great slot receiver.

1:35 Nasty hit on Hawkins. Fumble.

1:02 4th and 7. Good coverage. Toldeo QB scrabbles and jukes our LB, dodges another tackle, first down. Wow, this guy isn't a running QB at all. He was holding the ball in front of him with both hands when he ran. Wow, we suck.

:36 QB draw, multiple missed tackle attempts. Hardly got touched on his way to the endzone. Announcer is surprised (he keeps using the word over and over again) about how much faster and more athletic the Toledo players are. Great job recruiting, Dan.

3rd Quarter

15:00 My friend sends me a text "just woke up, rough game"

12:36 Toldeo receiver just runs past our safety for another touchdown. Hawkins should just take the safeties out of the game and put in more lineman. The safeties aren't having any effect in the passing game, might as well get some more pressure on the quarterback. 30-3

12:27 Return across the 50 by Scott. Again, why isn't this guy more involved?

7:26 Touchdown. Never want to score a touchdown too early against a mediocre MAC team. That would be playing right into their hands. Brilliant, Dan.

6:22 Another big pass by Toldeo. Jeff Smart trying to cover a receiver again.

3:54 Camera pans to Dan Hawkins. He looks sweaty and nervous. Is Dan Hawkins finally showing emotion?

3:46 Fake punt by Colorado. First Down. Announcer says Dan Hawkins is "a good gambler". Hey, at least he's good at something.

3:24 Andre Simmons comes into the game. Isn't this guy our only receiver with decent measurables (6'3"/210)? Didn't this guy play well last week? Why isn't he being used more?

1:43 Nice, touchdown. Way to cut the lead to 20 against a mediocre MAC team. I'm proud of you Dan.

1:35 Fumble. 3 CU players manage to miss the ball before Jimmy Smith falls on it. Travis Sandersfield, a walk-on from Limon, CO with the big hit to knock the ball loose. Ever notice how the best players on this team are walk-ons (ie. Jeff Smart, Scotty McKnight)?

1:23 Quick 14. Buffs look excited. Guys high-fiving and getting excited on the sideline. Even Dan Hawkins seems to be expressing some emotion. Maybe we have a chance.

4th Quarter

15:00 3rd and 6. QB draw. Toledo QB runs 61 yards practically untouched for the TD. So much for a comeback.

14:41 Another big return for Scott. He'll be a good player for whoever our new head coach is.

8:41 51-24

8:03 The Announcers are wondering why Cody Hawkins is still in the game? Maybe Dan Hawkins is just hoping some of his starters get hurt so he can blame the loss on injuries.

5:41 Wow, this game will really never end.

3:53 Cody Hawkins sets a career high for passing yards. Now we know why Dan Hawkins kept the starters in the game. Way to go!

1:56 Poor Cody. He's playing hard in garbage time. 12 yard run for a TD on 4th down, took a helmet-to-helmet hit. Doesn't look like he knows where he is. Hope he's alright, but honestly THIS IS WHY YOU DON'T PLAY STARTERS IN GARBAGE TIME. HELLO DAN HAWKINS?!?

0:00 38-54 Final. Game wasn't even close though. No talent, bad coaching, big losses. None of that is gonna change until Hawkins gets fired.

Can anyone guess the over/under when we start playing ranked teams? 50? 100? a million? It's like asking when the other team will put in the 3rd stringers and run every down.